It was a Boxer. 17. Best Review Site for Digital Cameras. The water I was heating for pasta refused to boil, and if my 12-year-old son was right, I wasnt helping by constantly checking on it. then they'll realize they had it right the first time. Take a read and pick which one you like! Hailing taxis. Sign up to receive the latest and greatest articles from our site automatically each week (give or take)right to your inbox. = Before google, there were librarians. But I only have 36 sheep, says the farmer. Founded in 2010, Thought Catalog is owned and operated by The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. For over a decade, we've been at the bleeding edge of media, pioneering an infrastructure for creatives to flourish both artistically and financially. Mom: Avocado, Daughter: Dad theres a moth on the outside of the bathroom door. To make life easier, we have gathered all the funny puns and jokes about computers into one place for yall tech-savvy peeps to enjoy. So I called our IT department. A: Dead Siri-ous. Why doesnt the elephant use the computer? Finding the perfect mouse for your PC sounds like a hard thing to do, but once your hand gets comfortable using a mouse, it just clicks. Person 1: Was that a Microsoft Office pun? = I have 18 questions. What kind of dog consumes food with its ears? Dog Puns. Dad: Dad is dead. It is also the primary memory unit of a computer along with the random access memory (RAM). There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who dont. What's the second movie about a database engineer called?The SQL. When you cross a dog with a cougar, what do you get? A. What does a baby computer call his father? Whats the difference between a cat and a comma? Please enter your email to complete registration. Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account? I saw a driver texting and driving. Q. He presses paws. Diet Jokes. What is it, an essential document from 1993? Now, Im fluent in English and Spanish, but your project is in Chinese. I don't understand how IT people don't end up in hospitals frequently. Don't use "beef stew" as a computer password. If GM had kept up with technology the way Microsoft has, wed all be driving $25 cars that get 1,000 MPG., I suppose thats true, the GM executive agreed. Free Update and 100% Undetectable. Orders a lizard. One watches the seas while the other sees the watches. Why didnt the dog want to play football? This recipe is terrible. Whats a computer geeks favorite snack?Microchips. The guy who invented predictive text died last night. Whats the difference between love and marriage? The norms of these websites differ from one website to another, with some making it mandatory for the user to visit the website and interact with the pet on a regular basis to make sure that it remains healthy. If you understand English, press 1. If you think that your computer, laptop, and phone spying on you is scary then think again. ~, As we waited for a bus in the frosty weather, the woman next to me mentioned that she makes a lot of mistakes when texting in the cold. Why do Java developers wear glasses?Because they cant C#. There is no point in going to your search history and deleting it. These cookies do not store any personal information. How does a computer science major pick up girls?whoops, I thought this was Google. Today I made my first money as a programmer. One has a rumbling tummy, and the others a tumbling rummy. I know this joke without the 'and those who don't' part. After a life of cybercrime, how did the hacker get to heaven?The password hadnt been changed in 2000 years. 2. Im at the library, and for some reason, when I plug my flash drive into the computer, it doesnt show up. What is it, an important document from 1993? Me: Siri, call my wife. Wow, that hit the spot!. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. Ive got a meeting with the guy that invented the progress bar during the era of dialup internet. How can you get a dog in the back seat to quit barking while youre driving? 34 Engineering . 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Love is blind and marriage is an eye-opener. YouTwitFace! Also, she's a firm believer that pineapple belongs on a pizza. 15. Why did the Dachshund want to sit in the shade? Saw IT last nightFar less computer networking and so much more murderous clowning than anticipated. The 2D or 3D cyber animals which you get to adopt as a pet are . How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? Start with a A client called my help desk saying she couldnt send an e-mail. Whats the difference between a $20 ring and a $200 ring? A. Doctor Jokes. I told my boss, Sorry Im late. Why was the dog stealing shingles? Violeta has completed her higher education at Northumbria University with a bachelor's degree in Media & Journalism (so you better believe she's checking her facts). If the Internet had a boat, where would they park it?In Google Docs. What do you get if you cross a computer with an elephant? I know, says the Sheepdog. Whats the difference between a 3K and a leaky sink? Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? Whats the difference between a piano and a tuna? What kind of dog chases anything red? Love is blind and marriage is . 35. When you cross an aggressive dog with a computer, what do you get? What dog keeps the best time? Son: Why is that funny? What's the first symptom of a computer is getting old? I changed my password to "incorrect". Mustard, its the best thing for hot dogs. Looking for a job? They have the biggest bark. The police said that they will get both computers back. A: Had a byte! Whats the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? New Yorkie. What did the processor say when it was being overclocked? Hey Pandas, Who Was Your Favorite Black History Month Icon You Learned About This BHM? How can you tell when the NSA is monitoring your computer?The power is on and youre connected to the internet. No worries. What happens when a dog loses its tail? IV. I was Facebooking in church, and the usher passed by and whispered, You better be texting Jesus.. Whats the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls? Where are dead computer hackers buried?In decrypt. You know you're texting too much when Virtual pets are not just considered to be good companions for growing children, but also for adults. Computer Jokes. Why does a noisy yappy dog resemble a tree? No, not there, he directed. Today I made my first money as a programmer.I sold my laptop. A SEO couple had twins. After accidentally swallowing Buzz Lightyear, what did the dog say to Woody? It's not stroganoff. Why does x86 have so many instructions?Because having too few would be too RISC-y. What do you call a cold dog? Saimonas has mainly worked as a freelance graphic designer, illustrator and finds joy in anything related to visual arts. Dogs are mans best friend for a reason. Saimonas is a list curator at Bored Panda with BA in Multimedia. A watchdog. Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Conspiracy Theory? 14. What chemical is released in your brain when you see something funny on the internet?Dopameme. Whats the difference between a pirate and a jeweler? How would a computer describe a small piece of cotton? The first item on the list will be "Caption," and the last will be "PSComputerName.". What type of a computer does a horse like to eat?A Macintosh. You can really get your parents fooled by pretending their smart phone screen or yours has been cracked. A collie-flower! "Whoever said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results has obviously never had to reboot a computer." Whats the difference between chemistry jokes and physics jokes? Think again, because your vacuum cleaner has been gathering dirt on you for years! I put so much more effort into naming my first Wi-Fi than my first child. . If your children are looking for some laughs, too, check out these top knock-knock jokes for kids. If the Internet had a boat, where would they park it? Gates boasted of the innovations his company had made. We usually make more money on repairs if we let people try to fix things themselves first., The closest Ive been to a diet this year is erasing food searches from my browser history. A lot of bites. What is the biggest lie in the entire universe?I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions. Heres one posted on Craigslist: ~. Look for a Bluetooth category. Why did the PowerPoint Presentation cross the road? Instagram is just Twitter for people who go outside. What makes a businessman different from a hot dog? If an anonymous comment goes unread, is it still irritating? I keep trying, but nothing happens. Have you ever seen a talking dog before? "Is there any turkey?" A hacker-tracker 5. Im at the library, and for some reason, when I plug my flash drive into the computer, it doesnt show up. It was one of the first personal computers along . Cute Puns. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University. There also exist some websites which provide the option of adopting interactive pets online itself, without having to download them onto your desktop. Whoever said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results, has obviously never had to reboot a computer. Because they have two left feet! $40K a Year to Attend Harvard University as Me. Requirements include a 4.0 GPA in high school or a 3.5 GPA in college. Whats the difference between humans and frogs? How hard is it to make a Facebook? Why does Task Manager use the phrase "Kill the Application"? You got a friend in me. ~. What chemical is released in your brain when you see something funny on the internet? Whats it called when it takes you a while to find RAM for your computer?Short-term memory loss. What is it called when computer programmers taunt and make fun of each other on social media?It is called cyber boolean! At the Beginning He Had Me Confused, but by Minute Two I Knew that I Shouldnt Have Other Gods = This is the last youll ever hear from me. Person 2: As a matter of fact, I Excel at it. It wasn't the web or the Google algorithm. What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper? But I rounded them up.. pet, any animal kept by human beings as a source of companionship and pleasure. If you enjoy this kind of humor, the Greatest of All Webs has blessed (or cursed) you to land on this page. What do you get when you cross a racing dog with a bumblebee? Its not stroganoff. All of them! 32. Im employed at a computer security company and have a colleague whose name is M. Alware. Whether youre a dog lover or a cat lover, youll appreciate these dog jokes. You like geek jokes, computer puns, and all things tech. What dog keeps the best time? Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married?Because they had a connection. Growlcho Marx. This comment is hidden. Why do sharks eat underwater internet cables? What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around?Dead Siri-ous. If it werent for C, wed all be programming in BASI and OBOL. The collie wobbles. Here is the list of the rest of our computer jokes, puns, and riddles for children and kids: Q: What did the spider do on the computer? Bloodhounds. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish. The best part of this is that you dont need to be online to interact with these computer pets once you have downloaded them onto your desktop. The person answers, and it's their mum saying "I have a computer question.". Whats the difference between ducks and dine-and-dashers? An Apple store near where I live got robbed.$25k worth of merchandise was stolen. Pupcorn. Whats a programmers least favorite Pixar movie?A Bugs Life. Start writing! When you cross a frog with a dog, what do you get? 21. Whats the difference between a good week and a great week? Every day, I walk down the street and tell passersby what Ive eaten, how I feel, what I did the night before, and what I will do tomorrow. 9. A lot of trouble with a postman. You can read more about it and change your preferences. By the pound! While taking stock of our products, I read aloud the final numbers to my boss. Whats the difference between a merry-go-round and someone caught in a lie? Whats the difference between a teacher and a cynic? Want to make your sweetheart laugh? To get a byte to eat 4. Who chases computer criminals? Its my laptop. Why can you never trust spiders?Because they post stuff on the web. We provide informative and helpful articles about the outlook for IT jobs throughout the U.S. DOCTOR: I'm so sorry, I don't follow. Google Jokes. Ooops! LOL. You need someone who is fluent in this specific language. Me: Samantha Gibbs is my wife. 1. Have you heard of that new band "1023 Megabytes"? Mom: Your great-aunt just passed away. 1 Hob-byte. 8. Send me a message, so Ill have your e-mail address. I waited and waited, but she never sent it. Heres what Siri sent: You need to get back to work now; you have a has-been to support.. We hope you are enjoying TechSpirited! All breeds can, since buildings cant jump! How does a computer get drunk? Read on and let the laughing commence. What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around? Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? Why did the database administrator slice a tree stump in half?He needed a binary log. Why do dogs tend to run in circles? Daily Life Jokes. Youd get a dog that chased after cars, but was actually fast enough to catch them! What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary? How do you know thats the problem?, My grandmother called to tell me shed gotten an e-mail account. The bartender says, So whatll it be?. Why did the man make pancakes for his dog? Where did the dog leave his car? Are you sending me something via fax? If you think that your computer, laptop, and phone spying on you is scary then think again,Because your vacuum cleaner has been gathering dirt on you for years. What did mommy spider say to baby spider? 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How are a dog and a marine biologist alike? Let us know! 9. I Went On Vacation With My Friend And Her Family, They Kicked Me Out So I Got My Own Room And Stayed On, "False Frugalities": 45 Examples Of People Trying To Save But Actually Losing Money, 50 Times People Had A Beautiful Tattoo Idea And It Got Executed Perfectly, "Can't Approve Overtime? 20. Person 1: Do you know how to use Outlook? This is a smart dog. Scene: Me using the Siri app on my iPhone. You can download images or even find online apps that will make Why did the computer show up at work late?It had a hard drive.